Realization

So, they say this whole insanity thing..is doing the same thing over and over again. and expecting different results. Well put me in the insane category.

I have tried running away from everything, on multiple occassions.

But this time...I guess it is different, I am not running away from everything, just the things...that I do not want to have to deal with...I seem to think that the problems will go away if I just push them away...but that does not work...SO, I just run, I run till I can not run anymore, I run till the street dead ends.

But maybe, just maybe. If things were as I wanted them to be..I would not be happy. (they say that when you get what you want..it really is not that great).

Maybe, I just have to go head first into all of this.

I have realized this may be one of the hardest things I have yet to do.

It's a growing process as well.

I have to face my fears, my regrets, for the most part my fears...

In a way, it scares me to do this.

Reality is going to kick me in the butt.

But reality may just be the thing I need right now.

Lets hope and pray....that I can get through this.